Help for Neglected Relationships

Posted on February 9, 2013 by bridget

It is not often that I recommend a course or an on-line program but this one is an exception. I have participated in the Renewing your Relationship online course run by the ToDo Institute and it is a wonderful program to help gain a richer and deeper perspective on your relationship. It offers you a chance to step back from the business of your everyday life and consider your dreams and your vows.

This month, the ToDo Institute is offering a unique opportunity to take on the challenge of love.  Their annual Renewing your Relationship program will run from Feb. 18 to March 19, 2013.  I think you might find it a valuable resource.  And through my affiliation with ToDo, you would be eligible for a $15 discount on this program.(If you decide to participate, just enter the code “BS-R13” in the coupon box during checkout, to secure the discount).

 Here’s what ToDo has to say about the Renewing your Relationship program:

“Most of us want smooth sailing in our relationships. We want support and comfort, respect and good cheer.  In fact, we kind of expect it.  When we trip on rocks that suddenly appear and trudge up hills when we’re already tired we can easily conclude that something has gone amiss.  Love’s gone wrong.  Or, more to the point, our partner needs to get with the program and shape up.

But focusing on what our partners need to do is misguided.  That approach won’t ever get us where we want to go.  Our greatest promise for a wonderful relationship is to become the best partner WE can be – it’s that simple and that challenging.

The Renewing your Relationship program offers a rich, engaging and unique opportunity to cultivate love in your relationship, despite the ups and downs of mood and circumstance. Every day you will receive a different exercise that will help you to strengthen a skill, or a practice that will support your relationship.

And you will have the company of many other people from around the country, and beyond, who are traveling on the same path, and communicating with each other through an online discussion. You will also receive support materials, including a CD and diverse readings (both hard-copy and on-line), to enrich and broaden your experience.

For information about the Todo Institute’s on-line courses phone: 802-453-4440 or 800-950-6034.

We hope you decide to be part of this empowering program on love!

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Every Moment A Fresh One – How to Stop Procrastinating

Posted on January 20, 2013 by bridget

Essentially self-discipline is the ability to get yourself to take action regardless of your emotional state. Self-disciple is a habit to be applied to your life day-by-day. Self-discipline requires you to connect today’s efforts with tomorrow’s results. The quality of your life depends on the choices you make. Sometimes it is necessary to make sacrifices today to meet success later on. A truly successful life requires hard work, perseverance, acceptance and will-power. The efforts you put into living today to the fullest will determine where your future lies. Every action you take today will have a ripple effect. Steve Pavlina says “Just as it takes muscle to build muscle; it takes self-discipline to build self-discipline. He goes on to say “Self-discipline is like a muscle. The more you train it, the stronger you become. The less you train it, the weaker you become.”

At the beginning of a new year it is inspiring and fun to set goals and imagine what your life will look like if your wishes come true. Along with goal setting, it is also important to decide what action to take to carry out your goals, and to do it! Intentions are powerful but you must also be clear on what you need to do differently to turn your goals into reality. Learn to complete a task and focus on doing one thing at a time. At the same time be kind to yourself, and give up on the need to do things perfectly. When you fall back into old ways of doing things, find an easy re-entry spot. Maybe your goal was to keep your desk more organized and you’ve successfully stuck to your new year’s resolution for the first four days of January. Now you notice the piles of paperwork piling up and a messy corner of your desk filled with sticky-notes, mail, pens and paper clips. Take small steps, such as spending 3 minutes before your lunch break throwing away one unneeded piece of paper. Over time, you will develop a new habit that will stick, you will strengthen your self-discipline muscle.  Self-disciple and not breaking your promise to yourself are key ingredients for turning your wishes into reality.

Jenny, an author and mother of a daughter with Down’s Syndrome has come for Morita Coaching for three months and is learning valuable skills to move towards turning her heartfelt dreams into reality. Jenny, like many of us, felt disappointed in her ability to keep her promise and commitment to herself. At the beginning of each year, Jenny set 5 goals to carry out. By the end of November each year, Jenny had not made much progress. She began to realize that her lack of commitment to herself and lack of activity led her down the path of failure. Jenny noticed that not keeping her word to herself was the root of her feelings of inadequacy and incompetence. Not keeping her promise to herself didn’t match her highest values of respect, integrity and honesty. When Jenny broke a promise with her friends, she felt upset. Now it was time for Jenny to honor her commitment to herself the same way she honored her commitment to others. Jenny noticed that when self-discipline was lacking in her daily routine, it similarly created a negative flow effect and her life became chaotic in more areas than one. She began to notice that she ate poorly, didn’t get adequate sleep, didn’t exercise or pay her bills on time. With coaching, Jenny began to find great worth in letting her values pull her forward. Achieving the right mix of honoring herself and her values, together with self-discipline helped Jenny meet her goals and live out her greatest potential.

You may notice that you are constantly breaking promises to yourself, just as Jenny did, and not keeping up with the goals you set for yourself. It is important to distinguish the difference between the emotions you feel when you don’t honor your commitment to get up at 5am and go for a run, or keep your desk clutter-free, or eat a salad for lunch. Become aware of the feelings of disappointment you feel when you disregard your promise to yourself and don’t honor your highest values.

A wonderful quote by David Reynolds, the author of Constructive Living is “Every moment a fresh one.” This is such a potent reminder that wherever life finds you at any given moment, you have the power to choose to act in ways that support your goals. No need to plan; no need to analyze; just do it! When you slack off for a few days, you can always begin anew. As you practice self-discipline and awareness, you will begin to live your life more in-tune with your values and ideals.

When life challenges you, remember be firm, but gentle with yourself and remember there is power in just doing it and sticking to your plans. Take one step at a time, and gradually pick up the pace. Over time you will develop more skills in self-discipline; you will develop more of your self-discipline muscle, as well as be able to enjoy some of the results of your efforts while enjoying a productive and satisfying year.

“Mastering others is strength. Mastering yourself is power” – Lao Tzu 

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How Neuro Linguistic Programming Puts You on the Path to Happiness

Posted on November 5, 2012 by bridget

NLP stands for neuro-linguistic programming and it provides an insight into your subconscious mind to set up new, productive patterns of behavior. If you are keen on gaining control over your life, achieving more in your career, improving your relationships and finding more happiness in your life then NLP is a valuable resource.  Many of the clients I have worked with notice an increase in their happiness level and a feeling that life is working out in their favor after receiving a NLP session.

Most people face significant challenges at some time in their life. Maybe it is a financial, health, relationship or a natural disaster that brings a time of chaos and uncertainty. Some people find life a constant struggle. Maybe you have periods in your life when you feel happy, healthy and confident, interchanged with periods of major downward spirals. Or maybe you are doing well on the outside, you have a good job, a nice family and you are healthy but on the inside you feel anxious, stressed or overwhelmed.

Neuro-linguistic programming helps you become aware of the areas in your life where you are limited and restricted; a NLP session can help you break through negative patterns that are a result of your life not working the way you want it to. NLP coaching can uncover unconscious choices made earlier on in life and effectively clear them so that you can move forward and actualize your goals and dreams and live a happier life.

When I ask my clients what is most important to them, the answer is usually to feel happier, to have closer bonds with friends and family. You are not meant to be solitary; you, like most people, probably function better and feel much happier when you are part of a community. When using NLP for happiness, rapport is one of the most important factors in establishing fulfilling relationships with the people around you.

Feelings of belonging and being valued help you feel relaxed, safe and able to communicate your true feelings and desires. Conversation, both verbal and non-verbal, form the bonds that you make with others. The interactions and gestures you exchange  give you a feeling of connection and belonging. Ultimately, you want to feel appreciated, as if you are contributing to society and making this world a better place. Your connection with others significantly helps you in finding your niche in the world.

Building healthy and strong connections  invites companionship and support. Diversity of the people in your circle can help you expand your own views on life and see life from a whole new perspective. Happy people have learnt the value of camaraderie and friendship. Happy people know that the bonds they form with others helps mold them into the person they want to be.

NLP is beyond being academic. For NLP to be most effective, the techniques need to be applied to your daily life.  NLP concentrates on developing the personality, expanding awareness and providing you with knowledge beyond your years.  Simply put, NLP aims to develop and nourish the well-being of an individual by increasing your ability to comprehend sensory raw data and your linguistic skills in lieu of verbal and non-verbal communication through programs that are designed to address immediate issues with regard to establishing rapport with the self and others.

NLP helps you gain instant rapport with others. With this, NLP also establishes a certain degree of confidence within you so that you can easily express yourself and your opinions about any issue. NLP sessions help you to be more expressive, so that you can make good choices, verbalize them and begin living your life through conscious creation.  On a deeper level, NLP helps develop the previously suppressed parts of yourself that can now put you on the road to happiness and success. 

Life unfolds from the inside out. Ken Keyes wrote “Your predictions and expectations are….self-fulfilling. Since your consciousness (thoughts) create your universe, all you have to do to change your world is to change your consciousness!”

You may believe you have developed a pattern of thinking and behavior that can not be broken. Your father did it. Your Grandfather did it. Now you have become the legacy bearer. Maybe your parents told you “Don’t make the same mistakes I made”.

NLP can help you break away from old and restricting patterns. NLP can help you tap into your unlimited potential and use your force and power to live a happy life.

From the first moment a client engages in NLP, they are amazed and at the same time motivated to further develop their NLP knowledge because of the primordial support it allows them. I have discovered that NLP often encourage my clients to learn and discover more about themselves leading them towards a much happier and meaningful life.

Happiness is a choice. Start making conscious positive choices today.

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Why Life Coaching is so Effective for Teens

Posted on October 8, 2012 by admin

Soul Coaching for Teens focuses on enhancing the life of the teen and teaching skills to balance and integrate the many aspects of life. The sessions include defining what is truly important and valuable, setting a precise set of goals and defining an action plan to carry them out. Life Coaching sessions are action-oriented, solution-oriented and the spotlight is on moving forward and turning goals into reality with as little stress as possible.

Many teens who come for Life Coaching are very smart and competent. They are usually driven and have high expectations for themselves and the life they wish to create. They want to make a difference in the world and don’t want to waste time, get stuck or lost along the way. These teens realize and value the importance of having someone help them think outside the box.

Meeting regularly with a certified Life Coach can help a teen:

  1. Reach their Goals: Helps teens set more realistic goals that inspire them. A coach will help identify what they want and set achievable goals that they really want and value. Value-based goals are naturally motivating.
  2. Gain Clarity: When a teen is clear on what they want, they tend to make the right choices and make fewer mistakes.
  3. Stay Focused: A coach will help a teen see where they are in their life and where they want to go. Staying focused on their goals and not someone else’s will help a teen stay motivated and inspired as they work towards obtaining their goals. They will grow from the process as they uncover their own value and special gifts and talents.
  4. Reduce Stress: Because life coaching is action-oriented it focuses on the doing. You will notice your teen will be able to accomplish goals more quickly and learn to be more productive and efficient with their time.
  5. Success: A coach will help a teen improve the quality of their daily life. They will be shown ways to accelerate their goals while being more effective, peaceful and happy. Success builds upon success and life coaching will teach them at a young age some important tools and skills to help them master the art of living well.

Life as we know it is changing. Young people are no longer satisfied with a life that focuses on “me” and “mine”. They are striving for something larger than themselves. The trend of young people seeking to create a more meaningful life for themselves has accelerated over the past few years.  People in their 20’s are re-evaluating what the good life actually is. Many do not have the same goals as the previous generations of marriage, 2.5 kids, a home in the suburbs, a secure job, a retirement fund, 2 nice cars and a few vacations each year. This generation is creating their own game of life and making up their own rules.

Many Life Coaches have embraced these changes themselves, have learnt the art of conscious choice making and live a deep and meaningful life.  They have created their own lives, not a life according to cultural standards and are deeply rooted in the truth of who they are and what they are here to do. Let us help your teen move towards the realization of living a life with passion, energy and dreams. It is time to think creatively; to take risks and to point the way for them to follow their God-given dreams. It is time to change the world.

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Life Coaching for Teens – Helping Your Teen Achieve Their Potential

Posted on September 7, 2012 by admin

A teenager is the joy the world is waiting for

 

Life Coaching can help motivate teenagers to achieve their fullest potential. A coaching session provides a space for your teenager to learn more about herself, about her choices and her heart felt dreams and goals. Life Coaching is not just about helping your teen stay organized or about developing healthier and more productive study habits. Coaching takes it a step further, and helps a young person gain clarity and develop an inner awareness to make decisions that are in alignment with what is most important to them.

Life Coaching for teens is about young people taking control of their choices and their future. It is about learning to be creative and find creative solutions to the problems of life and building self-esteem in problem solving and choice making.

Life has become so busy, that many teenagers are living life on auto-pilot. The choices they make are often made unconsciously and by default instead of with careful analysis

 It is important that teachers and parents don’t unduly influence them or encourage them to take an inauthentic path that isn’t really from their heart. It is necessary to give your teen the space and support they need to confidently create the life they want to live, as ultimately they are the only ones who are in control of the person they become.  

Teaching a teen to make conscious choices is a very valuable skill that can help them build a successful and happy life. Choice is the ability to recognize alternative and possible consequences, thereby enabling the selection of that which is most desirable, admirable, and honorable.

Teenage years are about claiming the unique gifts, strengths and passions that are their own. They are about turning away from false views imposed upon them and finding their own life path and purpose. During these years it’s important for them to learn who they truly are and not let their identities be lost, buried or devalued and instead become confident enough to stand in their own light and take action on what matters most to them.  An abundance of choices await each teen and together with a tight schedule of school work, sports activities, friendships, family commitments and maybe even a part-time job, life as a teen can seem overwhelming. Choosing the right college, the right friendships and relationships can be challenging and leave a teen feeling unsure and even afraid.

Life Coaching can provide a sweet spot, away from all the activities of teenage life, to help them discover and uncover their own delightful, authentic selves and proudly present that to the world. It is about discovering where their power is and their joy is.

 

Some of the challenges that can be helped with Life Coaching for Teens are:

·         Anxiety over grades

·         Frustration in relationships

·         Personal leadership

·         Pursuing their passion and purpose

·         Motivation and goal setting

·         Concern about college

·         Weight issues

 

Working with a Life Coach can help a teenager break free from the voices that tell them, they are not smart enough, or strong enough to do what they want to do. Maybe it’s the fear of telling a parent that they need to live their own life, or maybe it’s the fear of failing. Many teenagers can be consumed with the fear of making the wrong choice about a relationship, or a college. The teenage years are filled with constant change and each teen must develop the ability to continually let go of the old and make room for the new, and safely learn from their inevitable mistakes.

Teens can be afraid of the consequences of their choices, it is important to evaluate each choice. Clearly focused choices, rooted in self-awareness and trust will lead them in the right direction. Focused and courageous choices make them aware of their own power and innate ability to succeed in spite of obstacles and barriers. Being able to make their own choices in life develops confidence and provides natural feedback to change their decisions when necessary. Over time the mastery to make better and better choices is the result.

Meeting with a Life Coach can provide a breathing space, giving a teen tools to make them even more successful and confident.

 

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Reiki for Weight Loss – How a Reiki session can help you loose weight

Posted on August 16, 2012 by admin

 

Reiki (pronounced Ray Key) is a precise and powerful form of energy healing, where the hands are placed lightly above or just touching the body similar to “laying on of hands”. During the Reiki session the practitioner is balancing and aligning the subtle energies within your body. The intention is to create a feeling of deep relaxation and inner peace to help speed up healing, reduce pain and decrease other painful symptoms. Reiki addresses physical, emotional, mental and spiritual imbalances.

Reiki can help promote weight loss by helping you experience a sense of overall wellness, a healthier body, calmer emotions and a more peaceful mind. Reiki is very effective to help you reach balance and maintain your perfect weight. Many people notice lower stress levels, less tensions and a deeper and more peaceful nights sleep after receiving Reiki. Reiki, when combined with daily exercise and mindful eating can help assist with weight loss and bring about lasting results.

Reiki is not a fast-fix but a lasting solution to healing and raising the quality of your life. Reiki energy goes to the deepest levels of your being, where illness and disease have their origin, so that symptoms can disappear when the cause is removed.The main focus of a Reiki session is on any painful area or problem area of the body, as well as the endocrine system. A basic Reiki session covers all the points of the glandular system, which in turn control the hormones of the body. The endocrine system influences just about every cell, organ and the healthy functioning of your body and mind. The endocrine system plays a significant role in regulating mood, growth and development, tissue formation and metabolism. The foundations of the endocrine system are the hormones and glands. The hormones are the body’s chemical messengers and they transfer information between cells. The endocrine system releases more than 20 major hormones directly into the bloodstream where they are transported to various cells in other parts of your body.

Cortisol, which is secreted by the adrenal glands, has been called the “stress hormone”. This hormone is also responsible for providing you with energy, and also stimulates the metabolism of carbohydrates and fats. Research also shows how chronic long-term stress and excess cortisol can be the cause of stubborn belly fat in woman. If you are heavy around the abdominal area and lead a stressful life, accompanied by feeling overwhelmed and over-burdened then you may benefit from learning ways to control cortisol levels by reducing stress and allowing more time for deep relaxation and self-care. It may be time for you to schedule a Reiki session.

Maintaining a healthy weight is not just about what you eat or getting the right nutrition. It is also about emotional and psychological fulfillment. In the United States approximately 127 million people are overweight and healthy life-styles need to be adopted. Sustaining a healthy weight and reducing stress levels is vital to your well-being and quality of life as without the correct balance of food, exercise and rest, research shows that you can clog your arteries, strain your heart, decrease your immune functioning, exacerbate your nerves, or develop a lethargic attitude to life.

With regular Reiki sessions, this universal life force energy can help stabilize your appetite and help you become more attuned to what your body needs in order to be healthy and vibrant. The Reiki energy can help strengthen the digestive system, balance your emotions and therefore food cravings, help you develop self-esteem and better eating habits, and illuminate food allergies. Reiki can also help with eating disorders such as Bulimia and Anorexia Nervosa. Reiki is a nurturing and healing energy that provides physical nourishment.

Reiki can be a wonderful aid in weight loss, helping you to step back from a stressful day and re-evaluate your priorities and values. Reiki can help you get in touch with your own needs and provide you with a safe and quiet place to let go of the layers of burdens and weight that you have been carrying around. It may take several sessions to achieve results, but with continued effort, you will begin to see a healthier and happier you.

 

“You have everything you need:
A miraculous body, a phenomenal brain,
and a vast and powerful subconscious mind.
Now it's just a matter of focusing them 
in the right direction.”
-James Allen

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Take Your Feelings Along For The Ride – Living Fully with Anxiety

Posted on June 7, 2012 by bridget

 

"Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful." –         Mark Victor Hansen

 

To live and full and meaningful life it is very important to work with obstacles that are created internally (our thoughts and feelings). Feelings come and go and we can feel happy one moment as we watch the birds feeding at the birdfeeder in the garden then a few moments later feel anxiety as we notice that we have a pile of unpaid bills on the kitchen counter. Even attempting to feel differently about the unpaid bills does not change things; the fact is you feel the way you feel, whether anxious, frustrated, overwhelmed, exhausted or angry. It is both natural and normal to feel this way when you are experiencing some financial challenges.

Shoma Morita, the founding father of Morita Therapy says "Feelings change like the Japanese sky. Emotions are sometimes cloudy, sometimes sunny." Morita teaches that it is important to observe your feelings and thoughts, accept them, let them rise and fall, while you continue to take action and complete your task. Don't ignore your feelings; develop awareness without having to do anything about your internal feelings. Learn to be driven by purpose instead of your feelings, as your feelings can change in an instant, just like the clouds in the Japanese sky.

If your purpose is to go for a bike ride in the country this Saturday, then even if you have feelings of anxiety rising within you, you can take your thoughts and feelings along with you for the ride. The point isn't to shift the feeling but to ride your bike because that is what you want to do. The important thing is neither to control and suppress your thoughts or feelings nor act them out. Instead just allow your feelings to be there while you finish the action at hand. The key is awareness, if you remain conscious of the flow of feelings while still taking action, then you will not suppress them!

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Holding Grudges, Holds You Back!

Posted on April 17, 2012 by bridget

Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.  ~Mark Twain

Most people hold onto an unwillingness to forgive themselves and struggle with accepting their humanness. Once you forgive yourself and accept your imperfections, it is easier to accept the imperfections of others.

Learning the art of forgiveness involves releasing resentment towards those closest to you. Often it is our closest family members that we have the most resentment and anger towards. They are the people we blame when our life is not working out the way we planned it to. Parents, spouses and children are often at the receiving end of our negative actions triggered by our fears and hurts.

This includes forgiving anyone who has ever done anything against you. It may be justified to feel angry towards them. Maybe legally and intellectually you have every right to be mad. However holding a grudge towards others will only hinder your progress on your spiritual path.

Some people may also need to forgive God. Often people blame God for the suffering they endure and for the struggles in their life, the death of a child, the break-up of a marriage, illness or financial troubles. Consciously or unconsciously they believe that the pain is inflicted by God.

To life a conscious and aware life it is imperative that you take full responsibility for the life you have created for yourself. Only once you let go of the blame, the hurt and the deep-seated resentment, will you start to see miracles happening in your life.

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A Space For Mistakes

Posted on March 19, 2012 by bridget

"After all these years, I am still involved in the process of self-discovery. It's better to explore life and make mistakes than to play it safe. Mistakes are part of the dues one pays for a full life."  – Sophia Loren

An important lesson to learn in life is cultivating a light-hearted attitude. During stressful times you can become  serious and life can become a full of worries, frustrations and fears. Learn to pay attention and become aware of where you place your attention and what you choose to focus upon. Cultivate a practice of mindful listening and you will soon begin to appreciate the abundance surrounding and supporting you.

Having fun and laughing loosens the mind. A flexible mind is far more open to the beauty present in each precious moment.  Learn to step-back, take a couple of long, deep breaths, and lighten up. Learn what creates natural laughter, often it is the unexpected, the spontaneous, being silly, being playful. It is important to create a space in your life where there are no mistakes, no failures, no right or wrong answers, but instead a space where you can relax, let go and have some fun! Every human being wants to live a happy and joyful life and to avoid suffering and pain. An important part of doing this is learning how to lighten up and have fun, and when you fall down and life knocks you down, to pick yourself up again and learn how to be playful and laugh at yourself and life. Begin to notice the humor.

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PRACTICING FORGIVENESS AND CREATING MIRACLES

Posted on February 27, 2012 by bridget

FORGIVENESS AND  MIRACLES

Ask not to be forgiven,

For this has already been accomplished,

Ask, rather, to learn how to forgive.

 

Forgive the world,

And you will understand

That everything that God created

Cannot have an end,

And nothing He did not create is real.

 

What could you want that

Forgiveness cannot give?

Do you want peace? Forgiveness offers it.

Do you want happiness, a quiet mind, a certainty of purpose?

A sense of self-worth and beauty that transcends the world?

Do you want care and safety, and the warmth of sure protection?

Do you want a quietness that cannot be disturbed?

A gentleness that never can be hurt?

A deep abiding comfort and rest so perfect it can never be upset?

All this forgiveness offers you.

 

You who want peace can find it only through complete forgiveness.

In complete forgiveness, in which you recognize

That there is nothing to forgive

You are absolved completely.

 

The real world is attained simply by the complete forgiveness of the old.

Forgive the past and let it go, for it is gone!

 

Lift up your eyes and look on one another in innocence

Born of complete forgiveness on each other's illusions.

Those you do not forgive, you fear,

And no one lives in love with fear beside them.

Forgiveness always rest upon the one who offers it.

 

Forgiveness takes away

What stands between your brother/sister and yourself

It is the wish that you be joined with them and not separated.

Whom you forgive is given power to forgive you your illusions.

By your gift of freedom, it is given unto you.

 

As you give, you will receive

Giving and receiving are the same.

Illusions about yourself and the world are one.

That is why all forgiveness is a gift to yourself!

 

Forgiveness is the greatest need of this world

That is because it is a world of illusions.

Those who forgive,

Are thus releasing themselves from illusions.

While those who withhold forgiveness are binding themselves to them.

 

Those who do not forgive, must judge

For they must justify their failure to forgive.

But he/she who would forgive him/her self

Must learn to welcome the truth exactly as it is.

 

Forgiveness is the key to happiness.

Here is the answer to your search for peace.

Here is the key to meaning- in a world that seems to make no sense.

Here is the safety in apparent dangers that appear to threaten you at every turn

And bring uncertainty to all your hopes of ever finding quietness and peace.

Here are all the questions answered;

Here the end of all uncertainty ensured at last.

 

LET FORGIVENESS REST UPON ALL THINGS.

-Unknown

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